Whilst some women deal with an abortion relatively easily, many have deep problems. Most men regard an abortion as a problem solving exercise like going to the dentist. With both men and women there are exceptions.
There are cases where the need for an abortion is more clear-cut. A girl that has been raped and finds that she is pregnant can do without the additional trauma of a child. In other cases, the need is less clear, and these instances are the ones that cause most difficulties.
Sometimes a problem arises when, years after an abortion, it is discovered that a women cannot have any more children. The sense of loss and disappointment is enormous.
Women often seek an abortion in secret, so that her family, including her partner, are not aware. In addition to her other problems, she is unable to talk it over and has to look for the strength she needs from inside herself.
Quite often, the symptoms of a failure to deal with an abortion arise many years afterwards. It is common to see guilt, poor sleeping and certainly depression. Women often feel low self esteem and end up punishing themselves by overeating or drinking too much. When these symptoms occur, the woman is often unaware of the source of the problem, or cannot connect her present problem with her abortion of years or decades before.
The real problem is that the abortion does not sit comfortably in the woman's unconscious mind. Though consciously, she may realise that her course of action was the correct one, the unconscious mind does not accept it. Because she has no way of making peace with her unconscious mind, the torment goes on forever. Without a satisfactory resolution, her sentence and punishment is for the remainder of her life.
Though in the short term, the abortion seemed to solve a problem, in the long term, it seems to run contrary to her hard-wiring as a woman. She has been programmed to have children and yet she has taken a step which runs totally contrary to that programming.
Her deep seated feelings may include guilt. She may also feel anger in being put into that position with little or no support or understanding. She may feel fear that her secret may be discovered one day; there are some sins that you cannot confess. Most frequently, she will feel shame.
The solution is to seek peace with the unconscious mind. This is not as easy as it sounds and requires professional assistance. Before a solution can be found, it is necessary to examine all of the issues that affected the woman when she made the decision. The circumstances need to be understood in detail. This way, it is possible to, as near as possible, "step into her shoes".
Once all of the factors are out in the open, there are two possible solutions. The first is to tell the unconscious mind all of the issues that surrounded the decision; to show it that the abortion was the best of a number of worse alternatives. Though the abortion was not a "good" solution, it was the one that had the least downsides. If the unconscious can be persuaded to accept the decision, then the woman will, at last, have acceptance and peace of mind.
Secondly, if the unconscious mind will still not accept the rationale of the decision to have an abortion, it may be necessary to agree what punishment is suitable. The unconscious mind will already be punishing the woman and will go on doing so for the rest of her life. The abortion may have been twenty years ago, but for the unconscious mind, this is as good as yesterday.
It may be possible to negotiate a sentence of say, ten years of guilt, remorse and shame. This is a harsh enough punishment, but is reasonable when considering intentional murder carries a sentence of fifteen years. When the negotiations are complete, the unconscious mind can be told that the sentence has been more than completed and the punishment can now come to an end.
Though there are always exceptions for both men and women, it is a mistake to underestimate the long term effects of an abortion. If anyone is considering an abortion, seek counselling in advance. This is not to suggest that an abortion should not be undertaken, but it will help in coming to terms with the psychological effects. If anyone has had an abortion and it does not sit comfortably in the unconscious mind, seek professional help from a qualified Hypnotherapist or Psychotherapist; the problem will not go away on its own.